Mhairi’s Story

I lost my much loved daughter Niamh in January 2020 at 27 weeks gestation after I developed HELLP syndrome, a severe form of pre-eclampsia that unfortunately wasn’t picked up by my GP or midwife.

I’d reported reduced movements a few times and been told everything was fine. I eventually developed a spot in my eye and started bleeding which is when we decided to go to hospital and we were told Niamh had passed away.  I was critically unwell so I went through a rapid induction so Niamh could be delivered quickly the next afternoon Thursday 16th January 2020 at 1.01pm. She was 1lb 5oz and absolutely perfect.

Our wonderful midwife Mel brought us a Medium Simba Box, she did Niamh’s hand and footprints for us which are so incredibly precious to us. I can’t imagine what it would be like not to have those, they mean the world to me, a permanent reminder of how tiny and perfect her hands and feet were, something she touched and proof that she existed too. I’d say they have to be my favourite items but the touched by you blanket is also very important to me. We got to spend 4 days with Niamh in a Bereavement Room. I was too unwell to look through my Simba Box properly at the time but we chose a teddy to stay with Niamh and we wrote letters to her in the notebook that we later had read out at her funeral.

I remember very clearly reading the letter from a parent and just feeling like I wasn’t the only one carrying this pain, that I wasn’t alone and others had survived this before me. We didn’t put our Touched By You blanket with Niamh as we didn’t realise that’s what it was for until nearly her funeral so I kept both blankets on me for a few days so they would smell like me and like my perfume and then gave one of them to the funeral director to go with Niamh in her coffin so she has something touched by me. I have since slept holding her other touched by you blanket almost every night since.

We now have a shelf for Niamh in our bedroom which holds the handprints and footprints as well as her other Simba teddy and tealight holder. Our Simba Box is absolutely essential to us, it helped us so much to have these items in the darkest time of our lives and still to this day are my most cherished belongings.

Niamh’s Mummy, Mhairi